Initially the shock, dismay and misbelief takes over, you get a pain in your stomach and you wonder will it ever go away. People gather very quick to support you, people are just fantastic to support you at a time. You do have to ask "is this a dream" a very bad one. It's very hard to comprehend it all and take it in. Everything happens so fast, you are catapulted into organising a funeral. A funeral, this couldn't be happening.